The time lost

The black clouds showered tears of pain for the first time in my life on the 29^th of April 1991

It was 20minutes back, the angel of the house stopped breathing. It was just a few days back, that i got to know through my friend, that my mother was suffering from cancer and she would die soon, as she was breathing through her last stages of life. On that dreadful morning, she was quietly sipping on the apple juice that I was feeding her. Her eyes spoke to me, “my dear child hereby I leave you in this world alone”. She turned her head, and I thought that she wanted to take some rest. I told my dad that amma was sleeping. My dad as usual came over to the bed, and checked her pulses, and called everybody in the family and said that amma had turned cold. There was a sudden burst of cry, from the family. She was washed of all the impure substances, of her body and laid in the coffin in a blue silk Saree, with a maroon border. There she lay quiet, and asleep. The family doctor declared her dead, just for the sake of paper work. I knew not the meaning of death, nor did I understand, as to why my amma would not be with me anymore. As a child I knew not to put on my shirt nor have a bath. And from there on I started my journey of life, ALONE, ALL ALONE. I did not shed a drop of tear, on the day my amma stopped breathing but nevertheless have I spent a day, without remembering her, till today.

And from that day onwards, I have been meeting different kinds of people, who have left, and have been leaving a mark in my life. If my mom had not left me, I would have never had the need of making friends coz she was the best friend that I could ever have. I state my sisters luckier than me, as they have lived their youth with her, in her blessed care and her warmth - giving wings of love and affection.